I couldn’t sleep from 3.30 am last night. I had woken up to pee and was wide awake after that. I know better. Not to drink too much water before bed, but I can’t help myself when I am thirsty. So I say fuck it, and gulp. I tossed and turned for about an hour after that. I have been having a lot of these sleepless nights lately, I thought. I decided to write a list of things to do because a lot of times when my thoughts are not organised, I can’t get my mind to stop. Maybe that’s why I cant sleep.

Call Jessica frominsomnia-700x933 Step Ahead 

Email Trevor.

Write speech for Uncle Ndwiga’s funeral (may he rest in peace).

Pack gym clothes.

Fold laundry.


Do not eat sugar or dairy.

But I still lay awake. I did my daily devotion. Gave thanks. I listened to some gospel.Then some Lianne La Havas. I read my texts. Replied messages I had ignored and deleted conversations from the winter wolves in sheep skin. The kind who only call you when the leaves start to fall and the air gets sick with winter’s whispers. The cold can be brutal. These are clever strategists. Trying to stock up on as much…affection…for the coming season where the sun has forsaken us and the wind is bitter. And then I decided oh well, I am up now, it’s 5 a.m. Need to be up by half 6, might as well go to the gym now rather than after work because I will obviously be too tired and sleepy at the end of the day for a workout. So I wore my gym clothes. Trainers and everything. Went up to brush my teeth and heard from the half open bathroom window confident raindrops pitta patta down below.

Hell no, not walking to the gym in the rain. And I turned off the lights. But then I thought… It’s just water. Rain water. And there’s my cousin’s rain coat at the bottom of the stairs.I turned the lights back on,  brushed my teeth and left. The drizzle was lighter than I thought. But I sprinted to the gym nonetheless ,11 minutes away on foot. The workout was great. 40 minutes fasted cardio nothing crazy – 6.30 am. Endorphins were exploding into my bloodstream and I was upbeat. I had a spring in my step, like the proverbial middle aged man’s who has finally cheated on his wife one week before his retirement.

As I turned the corner, the cold raindrops now a relief rather than a nuisance and the crispy dawn shy with a distant glare, a car whizzed past me on my left and a tsunami of urban rain water that had collected at the curb splashed hard and unapologetically against my side.

“Oiiiiii!!!!!” I screamed, surprised as well at the acculturation of British slang.

And I turned around to scold, but saw the blonde girl who had been next to me on the cross trainer at the ladies section of the gym where I trained, brown murky water dripping down her face, not forgiven by the selfish driver either. She flashed me a huge bright smile, sudden and intentional to capture my attention, teeth white and sparkling in childish delight. I smiled back. She laughed. I laughed. And we went our separate ways.

That is the end of my story.




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